Born in a Jain family from six years of age I was eager to know everything about God. Something within told me to go in search of God in this very life. Whenever someone talked of god I found elders keeping it pending for next manifestation, next life! Something they failed to accomplish in present life… how could they postpone it for next manifestation? We are master and controllers of present life, not the next!
When answers to my queries were not forthcoming from elders in Jain community I switched to teachings of Lord Krishna in Bhagavad Gita. At that young age we had some lessons relating to Lord Krishna in our textbook. My curiosity for Lord Krishna kept increasing. I wanted to know who he was. Young about 7 to 8 years of age I kept wandering in the fields nearby in search of Lord Krishna with his cows and flute.
One day an elder of the village enquired what I was searching for. When I told him I was looking for Lord Krishna, the man with the flute he started laughing. After some time he told me Lord Krishna lived long time back and is no more. I was shell-shocked. All my aspirations of meeting him and clarifying my queries evaporated. Heavy in heart I slowly came back.
Still my enthusiasm to know everything relating to God kept increasing. Then in one book probably textbook containing stories I read all about Sri Ramakrishna Paramhansa and Maharishi Ramana. I finally realized that these two spiritual stalwarts finally succeeded in reaching God in their lifetime. Both these spiritual stalwarts started their pursuit of God via path of bhakti yoga and karma yoga but finding God could not be reached via path of bhakti yoga alone both finally switched to path of jnana yoga.
The path of self enquiry, Neti (not this, not this) followed by Maharishi Ramana attracted me. Lying in shavasna pose of yoga while going to bed or in daytime I indulged in path of self enquiry, Neti. Everything that was not God was outright rejected. As time passed by, I was experiencing higher levels of spirituality due to reduction of dross impurities within. The queries within me were dissolving at a faster pace. Since 13 years of age when I finalized to go in search of God, it took 25 years of yoga meditation to realize self, realize God in the wee hours of third of August 1993, 37 years of age.
Nothing to gain further, nowhere else to go… moment I leave my mortal frame I shall attain salvation moksha forever. I finally reached end goal of cosmic life, 8.4 millionth manifestation, last in cosmic life cycle. For all practical purposes I have become a pure soul atman in the cosmic journey of life. Everything contained in sacred scriptures like Bhagavad Gita and Upanishads became like ABCD to me.
Had I not followed path of Neti (not this, not this) I do not know whether I would have succeeded in reaching stage of self realization, god realization in present life. Maharishi Ramana, the master of silence was a true practitioner of path of self enquiry. Initially I felt that I was not going anywhere, but after few months I noticed considerable change in my approach towards life. I was finally nearing god. I expedited my indulgence in path of Neti (not this, not this) coupled with path of contemplation, logical reasoning.
Utmost patience, persistence and perseverance were necessitated to continue journey of spiritual path. I had god by my side all the time to guide me in the journey of life. From six years of age I could distinctly hear the sweet small inner voice of my soul atman that seemed to come from within my heart. Following the dictates of my soul atman I finally cleared my spiritual journey, reached end of cosmic life.
By: Vijay Kumar “Atma Jnani”… The Man who Realized God in 1993 – (Ref 151001)
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